new years recap

so new years was a great event for my whole family... ryan proposed to stephanie so now i have a "future brother in law." kinda creepy? i think so!

i never really could picture the day when something so special would happen, but after finding out ryan was planning this special event, i realized he was the one for her.

i am proud to say that i will be the maid of honor in my sister's wedding and i plan to do a very good job with that title. we have many parties to plan, colors to pick, and yes, we even have to find a DRESS that i will wear with a smile.

even though 2009 was a rough year for me, i made really big changes in my life. i basically created my future plans, leaving out parents and reality, but none the less, i have a plan. i got an awesome internship for the coming summer, and i lost about 35 pounds. it hasn't been easy, but it hasn't been hard either... i've taken it one day at a time and just worked through it all... but now im on to the year of 2010 and im so ready to conquer it.

i know that the road ahead will be easier for the then the road i have already walked and i am glad that i see that now. there are many people in my life that daily remind me of how awesome i am and how i really dont need to be anything more than what i have already become, but that is not enough for me. i want to great things with my life and that means, making not always the best choices, but the choices that work FOR ME!

its time for me to take life by the horns, do what i want, become what i vision myself to be and just go for it. i have one year left in college and i want to make it count. i want to be apart of my community and understand what makes me bleed purple and gold. i want to be able to wake up in the morning with a smile and lay back down with a mind full of memories.. i want to make this year count. not spend time on people that dont matter or just hurt me, but spend time with the people that raise me up and understand me without having to really talk to them. its time for me to just pull back from my trusting ways and just be me...